la zona, entre otras cosas

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hay algo ilegal que hacemos o que hicimos con todo el desparpajo de la repetición subversiva. hay algo que hicimos y vienen otros a recordarlo, nosotras no tenemos tiempo para darle atención, estamos pendientes de nuestros excrementos, de nuestras sedimentaciones, del calor que producen nuestros cuerpos, su energía. preocupadas de tener la papelera vacía (“che, qué linda tenés tu papelera” me dijo), de tener el archivo disidente, de olvidar con gracia y la desgracia dejarla fuera. de ahora en adelante, la zona. de ahora en adelante, la zona. de ahora en adelante, la zona y todo lo que hubo atrás es la zona también. me fui resfriada y aún empeoró. el calor que producen nuestros cuerpos es energía rompiendo muros, batiendo escombros, esnifando polvo de cal y cemento, gripe al tercer día. esnifando polvo de cal y cemento, el calor que producen nuestros cuerpos. al tercer día la máquina está como un feliz desperfecto. antes, la regla. medicación con aspirina, cerveza, anfetaminas e ibuprofeno. la biología y sus placebos. la zona, un lugar increíble y humedecido por lo colectivizado. la cocina, y unas gallinas más cercanas al cyberpunk que a la ecología. y qué coño es la ecología, si aquí hay muchos cuerpos calientes muchas horas al día haciendo muchas cosas materiales y prácticas, reconduciendo energía como “una estufa en medio de un campo de fútbol”, pensando cómo gestionar la mierda (sic), y también muchos árboles, mucha humedad y murciélagos como ramas chocándome el culo cuando lo exhibo con impudicia a las fauces de la tierra. y si esto no es ecología que me hagan una master class. a primera vista cualquier cosa podría ser virgen, “qué lindo” dicen. y mi coño abierto haciéndole una espectacular lluvia dorada (ecosexual) al cuerpo abierto de la tierra (y sus metales pesados). luego ya se va notando, como una mímesis desviada, empieza a salir del armario la mierda, el río es verde y a veces rojo y a veces sale cargado de peces muertos y por pura moral reaccionaria mis papeles higiénicos usados me los guardo en el bolsillo. personalmente no me molesta. mi pipí con ibuprofeno colonizando cientos de alcantarillados públicos financiados con los impuestos de las compresas del mundo. la zona emerge entonces de un hermoso y abismante realismo. un realismo que es el daño, una belleza que es el daño, luchando los árboles por superar al daño y su mutación sigue imperceptible como la hormonación de los peces que se comieron las hormonas de las mujeres que fueron recetadas por un médico que vivía tomando anabolizantes. lo demás es descubrir cosas nuevas a cada rato. lo demás es estar en un presente continuo.

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ellxs eran tan de estados unidos, pero tan de estados unidos que no se podía hacer nada para que fuese distinto. a veces las identidades se erigen como unas estatuas de hierro clavadas con cemento a kilómetros de profundidad bajo tierra. nos pareció que hacía falta sutileza, aunque como toda cosa bruta se te queda siempre clavada un poquito. mi cabeza, que por el momento es como una máquina de fabricación de embutidos (mil menudencias y despojos mezclados sin lógica alguna), se hace preguntas que a ratos son del todo reprochables.

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comienzo a hojear los diarios tempranos de susan sontag. en la primera página y con 14 años la muy hija de puta dice “la única diferencia entre seres humanos es la inteligencia”.

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