ser adulta es que ya no te moleste lavar los platos, porque son cosas que entran en la dinámica vital, del comer, lavar, cagar. hay un acostumbramiento con ciertas cosas, los algoritmos de la humanidad se van ajustando, se es más adaptada, en cierto sentido. sentirse en una estructura difícil de evadir, una rutina que repite la impredecibilidad precaria, pero que repite con insistencia su inestabilidad. ser adulta porque los números y los años así lo indican, pero sobre todo porque lo indica el hastío de la autorrepresentación cotidiana, de los códigos estandarizados y de la asunción naturalizada de todo aquello. ser adulta por sentir la fatiga material del cuerpo y resignarse al dolor. ser adulta porque no hay otra manera de disimular la infección.

pero esta adulta fracturada que tenéis aquí, aún siente extrañamiento al mirarse al espejo, ante la extraña posibilidad de llevar cargando tantos años con esta armazón de carne y huesos y en un momento, desconocerla. extrañarse con estos fonemas que resultan nombre, con esas cifras y documentos que representan identidad. no reconocer el sonido de las palabras, preguntarse cómo es posible que signifiquen algo y que lo hayamos podido consensuar.
esta adulta defectuosa aún siente extrañamiento con un papel que significa dinero, y sobre todo, con el afecto que los humanos llaman amistad. esta carcasa humanoide siente ternura con el abrazo, entiende en un momento que eso que llaman abrazo en realidad es un dispositivo de alta tecnología para la teletransportación sensible, que eso escapa a los límites de lo humano, que eso es un lugar de bien común y un espacio de satisfacción atávica anclada a lo real. entonces, en ese momento, se deja de ser adulta, se deja de ser persona y no hay palabras ni tiempo, sólo un corazón en proceso de descoserse.

635 thoughts on “

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